Beauty in a box

For some reason I can't remember, I started subscribing to a YouTube channel by a girl named Bunny who calls her channel "grav3yardgirl". She's pretty entertaining, I love her "Does This Thing Really Work?" series where she actually buys and records herself  trying out all those as seen on tv things that claim to change your life. Some of them really work, like the bacon bowl and some do not work that great, like the NONO hair removal. I think she almost caught her friends arm on fire trying to remove all his black arm hair. Anyway, I deviated from my usual programming to watch her open a monthly beauty box and try out all the goodies in there. I don't remember the company, but I remember thinking, "Man, that's like Christmas every month!"
So, I decided to look into this Christmas every month thing and there are TONS of these companies. I didn't want to pick just anyone or leave it to flipping a coin because that never works out so well - so I did some research. I looked at Allure magazines online article about this because I think that they are pretty credible in the beauty world. I also read some blogs like Buzzfeed and Babble.com.  I finally went with a company called IPSY. I clicked on the get started button and was taken to a 20 question beauty quiz where they asked me things like what type of styles would I like to try (I picked "hip and edgy" and "simple", I thought it a good mix) and what type of hair do I have, eye color, hair color and so on like that. I didn't mind this part, I expected it because how else are they supposed to know what to surprise me with? Then, and here's the parts I didn't care for, I had to pick ten friends to share the IPSY experience with. I'm thinking, I don't even know what the poop yet, why would I want to say "hey guys, do this thing with me." Then, I had to subscribe to their YouTube channel, no big because I can always unsubscribe later. Also, I had to sign up to follow them and one of their stylists on Instagram, which I didn't mind because I like the pictures on Instagram. I was hesitant about doing this because it's $10 a month, but I just cancelled my Netflix since I never watch it anymore and I can cancel the beauty box anytime.
Now I'm all signed up and am supposed to be getting a surprise beauty box with 6-7 new things and samples by mid-May (just in time for my birthday! yay me!)

Hello? Remember me?

I'm sure not many people are reading this blog and I don't blame you. Nothing too exciting happens here, it's just my life. But still, I feel the need to record some things to keep a record even if it's just for me. On my 35 minute drive to work everyday I am thinking about what I should write or post.
Instead of trying to get all caught up on one page, I will start from today and continue to blog and update when referring back. How's that? Okie dokie, here I go.

This week the Spring Quarter at school started. I don't have anything in the display case this time, but my classmate who I gave some of my ideas to because he couldn't think of any does have two of mine in the display case. I'm not sure how I feel about that. On the one hand, I told him, "Here, just take these, they're good ideas, I just couldn't make it work" and he did and they look great. But, they're my ideas and I couldn't make them work, but he can. See, this is my problem, and I know it: I have great concepts, but I have trouble with the execution. That's why I need a team. I'm good in a team because I can recognize people's strengths and order the project accordingly. This is called being a Director, but I have to start at the bottom to get there and I'm afraid I won't ever even make it to the bottom with the crap I've been putting out. Before you start to put in the comments something like "Oh Vicki, you're a great blah blah blah blah", let me just stop you by saying that if I'm so great, why couldn't I pass my portfolio class? I had to drop the class so I wouldn't fail and I still had to pay for it and all the printing of the projects AND since I didn't pass, I still have to take it and pay for all of it again.
My classmates were upset that I didn't pass. I don't know how I feel about that because I don't understand why they should be upset about me not passing.
I still cry whenever I think about the whole ordeal because it scares me. I mean, if I can't pass my portfolio class, I can't graduate and all the money goes straight down the drain. If that's the case, I really don't have any business being in a design school, then do I? I have another chance this summer. I hope the projects I've been working on will be good enough to pass then. I can't go through another failure like that, financially and emotionally.
It's not like I've never failed before. I've been failing at life since I left high-school. It's just that to be told you're not good enough to be doing the one thing it's taken you years to find, is heart-breaking.

too much sadness

This week has been a bit rough.
First of all, another really good person in my life has left this Earth, my friend Trish. She had a brain cancer and couldn't be treated. When she went through chemo and lost all her hair, her very best friends who are closest to her, shaved their heads too so she wouldn't be alone. She was my age and I don't understand how someone so wonderful had to die. She had just gotten married a few months ago to a man she'd known her whole life. I feel bad for him, losing someone so soon in such a horrible way.

My first week of school has felt like a mad race. I have a Monday afternoon class, so I get up at 6:30 for work, leave work at noon, eat a sandwich on the drive to school, class at 1-5 then home to do homework. I have an online class in Psychology, which an assignment was due that first day! I came home at 5, opened my online class and noticed I had until midnight to submit a paper already. WTF? Then had until Wednesday to read the chapters and submit another paper, also to review and critique two other students work on both assignments. I still have another assignment due by Sunday night. I don't like this online class business. I like to be able to go to class, do it and that's it, none of this string it out over the week crap. Well, good thing is it's only 5 weeks which is good because then I will have time to spend on my Portfolio class. OMG I have soooooo much work in that class. On the first day I had to show up with work. This is why I spent my Christmas vacation doing 2 years worth of work in the 3 weeks (if you are not aware, I lost all my digital files from the first 2 years of my schoolwork). I was nervous about bringing in these things. My critique wasn't that bad though. The teacher either loved it ( put a star) , approved it (a check mark) or put a big X on it because it was no good. I didn't get any stars, but I didn't get any X's either. I got 3 check marks and the rest had minor changes to make. So I have to redo all that plus 2 more projects are due next week! And I have to write a resume. And I have to finish making business forms for another class. And I have chapters to read for another class in addition to the Psychology homework. Let's see what else, what else can I pile on?

A good thing that happened this week is that my bosses took me out to lunch on Wednesday and I'm going to the rodeo parade with my friend Marci on Saturday over in Fort Worth, so that should be fun.
Now it's 2 a.m. and I can't sleep because I'm up thinking about the projects I need to do.

Betty, me and Trish at a play --- goodnight my beautiful friend
I will miss your cute smile.