I finally called my mother

I should be posting all the projects I've been doing in school, but I keep forgetting to put them on my flash drive.
Anyway, I finally had a few hours to myself today and I decided to call my mother to get her all caught up. Now I will get you caught up.
Since my last post, I've been trying to talk about this guy I met up with to have beers between classes on Wednesdays, but I feel like I'm in the friend zone. It's okay though I guess because I met a new guy who is weird and crazy and forward like me.
In my copywriting class we presented our campaign idea for MOOYAH burgers and I got my critique back for it. My teacher had some ideas for the illustration parts. I got what he was saying and I told him that, then I told him that I have the ideas, great ideas, but I don't have the skills, especially the computer skills, to carry out my idea. He worked with me a little and I finally ended up with something I feel pretty good about, but we will find out about that on Monday.
Now, in my art history class, I was approached by a classmate who is a film student. She said, "Have you ever done any modeling?" I laughed and said, no. She asked me to be the model in a commercial she and her classmate were making for a boutique here in Dallas. Don't get too excited, it's just for school. She told me the place was going to be at a salvage yard and I would be modeling around a classic car. Cool, I thought, because I love classic cars. Then she told me the time: 8a.m. Not cool, everyone knows I'm not good with mornings, but I said okay anyway. Now, let me back up to Friday after work: I went to my new friends apartment and did not sleep, but got up at 7a.m, straightened my hair with his straight iron and put on makeup and drove the 30 minutes to the photo shoot. Ugh.
It was cool though. I got a sunburn and a bottle of ice tea for my efforts. My debut should be in two weeks and as soon as I get a copy I will post it here. Okay? Okay!
Ok, so then I had to go to work at 2 til 10. Also I was house sitting in Plano, so I had to drive aaalllll the way up to Plano sunburned and tired. It was okay though because my new friend wanted to stay with me. We had a water fight and had fun.
Now, back at my apartment, a girlfriend of mine asked if it was okay if she and her new friend could stay at my place until they move into their apartment in early June. I thought, sure because I'm housesitting anyway. But now I'm not housesitting and they are here and it is getting crowded. I now realize that I am used to living alone. It's ok for now though because they will be out soon and they've been bringing in groceries and washing the dishes.
For now, here are a few pictures:

me at the photo shoot saying "Jaysus, it's hot as balls out here!"

I have drawn this hamburger, first by hand, then scanned in and manipulated using my nemesis: photoshop

at the Dallas Museum of Art, me quietly observing a Monet painting for an art history class assignment

nah nah, nah nah nah...

I'm sure I'm not the only person in the world who has a conflict with her age. My 42nd birthday was on Wednesday and I had fun with friends before and after going to class.
The problem I have with my age isn't that I don't physically feel 42 or the fact that I don't look 42, it's that I don't act 42. I have a problem with this because I don't know what that means. How does a 42 year old woman without children, who is in college and lives in a tiny apartment scattered with artsy stuff supposed to act?
Yes, I do childish things sometimes, so what? Everyone should, it's fun. But I don't think that one act of  what someone considers childish behavior once in a while should set my whole persona, because it doesn't. I wonder if I do those things simply because it's fun or because on some subconscious level I'm upset because my mental age and my chronological age don't match and I feel at odds about that.
Still, I act how I act regardless and I don't feel I should apologize for it.

It's the reason

I have finally figured out why I'm not a great artist:
 I've never had any hardship and struggle in my life.

I didn't grow up rich but my parents made sure that my sister and I didn't go without anything that we needed. We didn't always get what we wanted, but we never went without Christmas presents or birthday presents or a new Easter outfit.  My parents did the best they could so my sister and I didn't have to struggle and I know that and appreciate that.
Whenever I've made bad decisions, my family was always there to help me out and support me. Even my bad decisions in life aren't bad in comparison to others: I've never done drugs, I don't have a drinking problem, I've never had a falling out with a family member or lost a friend over an argument, I've never filed for bankruptcy, never been pregnant so I've never had to decide to give up or keep a kid, I don't have health problems that keep me in and out of the hospital or require some sort of medication. Even now, I may not have any spending money to buy new shoes or go out to eat every night, but my bills are paid and I have a place to live and food in my cabinets. My decisions tend to go wrong when I don't listen to my "gut" feelings: intimate relationships for example. But even then, I don't think of that as any sort of struggle because I never really allowed anything to escalate dramatically. Nothing good can come out of that, right? Wrong. Good art apparently emerges from the ashes of something burned down. Seems like only when there is a struggle is there room to get creative.
I'm not saying I need to start proverbial fires, but I really do need to find my "thing". The thing that makes me recognizable. The thing that when people see it, they say, "Oh, that's gotta be a Vicki thing."
I don't know what it is.
I also finally figured out why I get so angry at my classmates when we turn in assignments and even though we're all getting critiqued, I look at their projects and think "when am I gonna do something cool?" I get mad at them because they are in the same place I am, but starting out earlier than I did: they're younger than me, yet that much further ahead than I am. And that makes me mad because when I was 20 years old, I didn't have the first clue about anything - at all. And here these kids are coming up with great ideas on how to create something. Then there's me. With all my life experience over them, you'd think I would know more and have more ideas, but I don't.
I am still thankful for the family and friends that I have. Hopefully I can learn to draw inspiration some other way.

confessions

Dear Reader,
I have sinned. It's been almost two weeks since my last blog.

Here's the thing. I think about what to write here and then get distracted thinking about homework (since I'm in graphic design for advertising, I have two campaigns going on right now). Also, I tend to  think about a guy I talked to in school or in line at the store and wonder why he didn't ask me out even though I said he could buy me a beer.

And, I've been trying to work on my "Leftovers Cookbook" (I'm convinced that once I'm actually done with it, it will pay my tuition. One can dream, right??).  I usually only work on it when I need to, read: when I'm out of groceries and need to get creative in the kitchen.

A few days ago I wanted pizza, but since I'm out of spending money, I could not get one delivered and didn't have the ingredients to make one. So, I thought, what if I did have pizza and further more, leftover pizza, what the heck does one do with leftover pizza other than eat it cold with warm beer from  last nights party or crisp it in the toaster over or stove top pan??

Enter Pinterest. I typed in "leftover pizza" in the little search bar and got two really good answers. One involves dicing up a slice, mixing it with eggs and cooking it like scrambled eggs. I love eggs so I'm down with that one. The other idea absolutely blew my mind. Put it in a waffle iron! OF COURSE PUT IT IN A WAFFLE IRON!! It works for cinnamon rolls and crescent rolls, why not?
Mr. J. Kenji Lopez-Alt  over at seriouseats.com  seems to have perfected this method. I also like the way this guy writes, it's fresh and funny.

Now, all I need is some leftover pizza and I can try this out!

Who wants to donate to my cause?